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Powerful and time tested strategies to win an ex back and bring back happiness to your life. You need to understand and know his or her before winning them back. A lot of this is counter intuitive so be prepared to use some odd strategies .
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Steps
- Take a good look at yourself: When you first fall in love with your partner, what type of a person were you? In the first place, your partner was attracted to you because he/she felt good about you, and you were fulfilling his/her emotional needs. Sure enough when a partner strays, others will tell you ‘people change'. However, you should take a moment and think “Have I changed?” Be that person whom your partner was once deeply in love with. Your partner strays because his/her needs are not fulfilled. Think of what you can do to save the relationship. Correct bad habits and mistakes, if any. Remember, you have to change in order for the external world to change.
- Are you meeting your spouses emotional needs? If not they will not stay with you. Find out what their emotional needs are and do everything you can to try to meet them.
- Are you communicating well? When communication stops so will your relationship. You cannot heal a failing relationship without good communication.
- Do not stick to your partner like glue: Practice detachment. Never show your desperation and craving no matter how bad you want him/her back. This will only make your situation worse. Make sure you don’t make it seem like you want him/her back. Be a carefree and independent person. As mentioned earlier, you must be able to give her true and unconditional love no matter what happens. At the same time, cultivate the hobbies and attitude as such that you are fully responsible for your own's happiness. You really do not need to depend on another person to experience happiness and peace. If you learn to cultivate this pattern, you will realize that your lover will be the one who is scared of losing you.
- Do not stop them from seeing other people: If you start to complain, cry, and whine, you will instantly drive him/her away to that third party! Human nature is as such that the more you stop them from having something, the more they want it. On the other hand, respect his/her choices and freedom. Do not let jealousy set in. Let them do whatever they please and let them know that you will always be there. Soon they will realize that you are a better person than your rivals as you respect them more than anyone else does.
- Agree with everything your spouse says and does. Yes that's right stop arguing, disagreeing, scoring points etc. Just simply agree in a sincere and meaningful way. This will quickly reduce tension between you and your spouse and start defences dropping a little.
- Stop pursuing now. Stop pressurising. Stop trying to change the mind of your spouse. All of these will quickly reinforce all the reasons why he/she wishes to leave/ end the relationship.
- Stop pleading, begging asking. It's seen as weakness and pressure and pressure sends spouses away very quickly.
- Stop telling him/her you love them. It counts as pressure and pressure is a total no no.
- Appear more aloof if you can. Its so hard but if you can - back off you stand more of a chance.
- Keep a diary of what's happening. Be analytical and cold in your observations and assessments. Try to track changes, improvements and deteriorations and change your modus operandi accordingly.
- Act perfectly normal. Act as though everything is just fine. You might be falling apart inside but outwardly you must appear OK, content, positive happy. What ever your spouse does is fine by you. Remember NO PRESSURE!
- Enjoy your friends, hobbies, work, children in a genuine neutral way. This helps restore some balance to your emotions and also deflects attention and pressure away from your spouse.
- Make them jealous. Yes that's right make them jealous by seeking friends with members of the other sex and be public about. I am not suggesting you sleep with them but certainly imply there's a relationship starting. maybe go as far as a kiss goodnight - show caution and only go as far as is necessary. Jealousy is a powerful emotion and it can soon start to sow seeds of doubt in your spouses mind. Suddenly it can make them realise what they might lose.
- Remember you are attractive! There are millions of other men and women out there who would just die to meet someone like you! Sure your confidence has been hit, your self esteem is very low and you are hurting like hell because your spouse is going / gone. So get out there and meet people. Join on-line dating agencies, join dance groups, join hobby groups, in fact do anything that helps you meet people.
- You will be most attractive when you are meeting someone who you really would like to have a relationship with. Your confidence returns, you stop pressurising your spouse, you exude detachment. So get out there and take control of the situation. This is the nuclear option. It works more times than it fails. Who knows you may meet someone so special that YOU wish to leave your spouse!
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Tips
- Go out and take a breather. Staying at home and thinking of the breakup will not help you win back your ex.
- Spend some time analyzing the situation and find out the reasons that caused the breakup.
- Do not beg your ex to come back.
- Change any bad habits that you have.
- Do not try to change, manipulate, force, threaten and restrict him/her.
- You must be able to give true and unconditional love to him/her no matter what happens.
- Respect his/her choices.
- Remember what happened that caused you two to break up and don't let it happen again. If you broke up because one of you were jealous, show him/her that things have changed and that you have more trust in him/her.
- You can't really control other people, so don't try too hard
- Everytime you see each other be smart toward her\him, Actual be an ACTOR with positive mind.
- Give up and face reality if its not working.
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